Conservative Refocus

By Barry Secrest

In a Conservative effort to appease the thumb-sucking Lefties, we have stumbled onto a solution.

This is the first roll-out of a suggested model for what will most likely be a kinder and gentler--even warm and fuzzy--political map for future US Party activities.

Eschewing the use of those ghastly red circles with cross-hairs, which simply bristle with kinetic violence, we have opted to use warm and fuzzy creatures that instill both comfort and even childlike longing for the particular area of Party interest which should, in the future, be termed a "playground for political activity."

For those Progressives who could feel threatened by furry beasties, we have also substituted a colorfully delicious lolli-pop which can easily be utilized in other areas while parlaying a sweet feeling.

Hopefully, this should do the trick as opposed to those previous "mayhem inducing" targeting maps, such as the one below, thoughtfully drawn up by none other than the Democratic Party itself.  Can you see the words 'behind enemy lines" and  "ripe targets"  on the chart?  Wow! Now that just sounds like something Obama himself might say...oh wait...might that make us uncivil for pointing it out? Or was Obama uncivil for saying it? Maybe we should call Paul Krugman....

Conservative Refocus